A Simple Yes or No

In life, we as human beings tend to try to over complicate things.  We create problems where non exist.  On the other side of that coin, we also have a tendency to overlook problems, or ignoring issues all together.  We are a complicated species.

I’ve been guilty of both sides of this problem on multiple occasions, and will likely continue to do so to a certain degree.  I had written up my next blog post and it was more or less a rant piece on why people can’t see what’s glaring at them in the face sometimes.  Even with someone pointing it out,m it’s like they have blinders on in that regard.  It ended up getting more personal than I had intended, which made me realize, I was too close to the situation.  I really took a few steps back any analyzed  (over analyzed I’m sure), the situation  and that’s when it dawned on me.  Sometimes when people say they want your help, that’s not exactly what they mean.  They mean they want your support, even if you see the dangers of their actions, they just want you there to listen, to tell them it will be ok, even if that may be a lie.

There is a big difference between respecting someone’s choice and agreeing with it.  Sometimes we get so fixated on an end result, we ignore bothe the good things and bad things that happen along that journey.  I still respect my friends choices, and I won’t point out any red flags anymore,  I will acknowledge the good things that were a result of that person’s choices. Admittedly that puts me in a quiet position most of the time, but people will see what they want to see and are quick to place blame on those who point out someone else’s error.  People need to choose for themselves what they will and won’t accept in regards to how they are treated.

This has been a hard lesson for me to learn.  I grew up with a mindset that right is right and wrong is wrong. You don’t act a certain way, and you don’t allow yourself to be treated a certain way.  People grow up differently though, and what isn’t acceptable to one person is completely acceptable to another.  I’m not saying one person is right and the other wrong, I’m just saying their perspectives aren’t the same.  

Sometimes being honest means not being kind, or telling people things they already know, but don’t want to hear.  I’ve started implementing a very simplistic way of thinking.  It’s a yes or no system.  Does the person know what you are going to tell? Yes? No need to tell again, they don’t want to hear it. Will it harm the person to say it? Yes? Don’t say it.  Do they want your opinion? No? Just give them your support and be there to listen,  A lot of life’s big issues can actually be boiled down to a yes or no answer system.  Do you know it’s harmful? Then don’t do it. Do you have faith that it can be done? If yes, put you’re all into it.  Always remember though, if your all isn’t good enough for it, it’s not good enough for you.

Also, I want to bring up for the billionth time the word honesty. Just be honest, it saves time, heartache and so much more,  I respect someone who hurts my feelings by being honest so much more than someone who lies to try to not hurt them.

Until next time, dear readers...

RedCon1

As many of you have heard, I am now a Tier Operatior for RedCon1, a supplement company.  I do not back anything i have less than the upmost belief in, and this is one of those products that does exactly as it advertises.  I have been using their products for a while and my results have been amazing, and yes, are all legal and non banned substances.  People want to know how to try their products without making a large purchase, and that is as simple as ordering samples.  Use my code T20JRiggs and you will get a 20% discount.  If you know me in person, I would be glad to share some samples of product with you, just be sure to email me!

I am looking forward to a great future with this company, and I am looking forward to what other amazing products they come out with.  As a side not, these are also the best tasting products I’ve had to DATE, which says a lot.

Order Here:

Let me know what you think!

Until next time dear readers!

Always in the Process of Improvement

API.

Always in the Process of Improvement

That’s the goal.  Whether is is physical improvement, mental improvement, life situation improvement, it doesn’t matter - just keep striving to improve.  The best advice I can give someone who is trying their hardest to reach an attainable goal is simply this. “Keep going, don’t stop.”  It’s simple, but even just the slightest encouragement can make a word of different to someone, as words of discouragement can do the opposite.

Now for a word on happiness.  Happiness comes from within.  Outside factors can have an effect on how hard you have to try to be happy, but ultimately, it is an internal decision, everyday.  I love to see others happy, that is one thing that brings me genuine joy, however, in my process of trying to make others happy, I’ve neglected most of the things about me that make myself happy.  I’ve been happy, but it was vicariously through someone else’s happiness.  Happiness has a tendency to rub off, and that’s a very good thing.  Now, when you solely depend on others happiness to be happy, you need to take a look at yourself.  It’s ok, things happen. Life often gets in the way of most things, but we have to work with it everyday.  

Recently I made the realization that while, yes, I am happy at the moment, it’s not my happiness, it’s others rubbing off.  I mean what I need to be or have to make me happy, and that is a work in progress.  I’ve tried some things (nothing illegal), to see if it was what I was missing, and I’m sad to say that it didn’t work.  My heart knows what it knows, and for once, my brain and heart are in perfect alignment, and I have to wait for that opportunity.  It’s been an emotional roller coaster, that’s for sure, but yeah, it is what it is, and while that may make others sad or even mad, it’s better to figure things out early on rather than farther down the road.

Take a deep look at your situation. Are you truly happy? If not, then change it, if so, then cultivate it.  It’s a simple formula.  In order to make yourself happy, you might make others unhappy or even mad, but that’s not on you, that’s on them. Remember that.

Until next time dear readers...

The Book and a Quick Note

So, I thought I would do just a post on my book since there have been a lot of inquiries.

The book is in progress, I do have a publisher lined up, and I will be giving out codes for free downloads (limited amount) when it does get published.

There, does that answer your questions? I’m kidding, I’ll keep going.

The most frequently asked question is what the book is about, and the short answer is me.  I’m not a narcissist, or anything like that.  At the core of the book, it is a self help book.  I spent a lot of time not only telling you about my life events, but also what I feel like I did wrong and how I could have avoided some things, so in turn, hopefully you will learn from my mistakes.  No, I don’t picture myself as this guru for motivational writing, I picture myself as a guy who is been through a lot and if I can help just one person, that would validate all the hours I spent on this book.

Next question.  How long have I been working on the book? Over a year.  I haven’t been able to just schedule a time each day\week to work on it, so it’s not coming exactly quickly, but trust me, it’s been quality of quantity.  There are long chapters.  There are short chapters.  There are powerful messages.  There are silly anecdotes.  From those I have let preview it, I have gotten many different responses.  There have been laughs, there have been tears and there have been proposals of marriage.  Ok, I made up that last one.

Back of the book description? I actually haven’t thought of that, but I’ll take a shot:

“From the author of myblogtypething.com comes an insightful outlook on life.  James Riggs has gathered together some of the best and worst times of his life and shared them with you, and he includes insights on said events.  He opens up his deepest emotional moments in his life and dissects them into moment by moment sections to explore what happened or what could have happened.”

When I do get closer to publishing, I will be sending out digital copies for quotes and reviews, so if you want in on that, please let me know.

All in all, the book is coming along well, just not quickly.

Thanks again for your continued interest!

Now, for the quick note.  I had an epiphany. Being happy is actually very simple. Well, the formula is, the practice might be a bit more difficult.  To be happy, you have to choose to be happy.  Sounds really simple, and it is, but choosing to be happy means more than just saying “Hey, I’m going to be happy today.”  Being happy means you might have to make a few small sacrifices.  Choose to be happy, not right.  A common argument is that I’m right, you’re wrong.  The subject matter is all over the place with arguments, but that is what it boils down to.  I’m right, you’re wrong and you can’t convince me otherwise.  Stop it.  If you are in a relationship with someone, and really love that person, you don’t have to be right, you have to be happy.  Let them win.  Don’t be rude about it or anything, just don’t argue, let them finish their monologue and them give them a hug.  Be happy.  You woke up, which is a blessing each day, you have a roof over your head, which a lot of people don’t, and you aren’t starving to death (literally, I mean near death from malnutrition).  Take a moment to reflect on all that you have, not what you don’t have.  We take for granted soooo many things in this life, but when we start living a life with gratitude and grace, a whole new outlook is available.  I’m not saying if you are in a bad relationship to just ignore it, if you are in a bad relationship, end it. Move on.  Be Happy. Don’t be ignorant of something that is harming you, cut out the unneeded negative.  Happiness and contentment are gifts, and they are gifts we give ourselves.  It’s not a selfish thing to give yourself credit for something you have accomplished and are proud of.  Today, as of this moment, I am happy.  There are so many things going right in my life that I am focusing on, that being happy is easy when I think about them.  I have bad things going on too, but when you focus on the negative, you become negative and the good things in your life may just disappear and never be available to you again. Be grateful.  Gratitude and Grace.  

Until next time dear readers...

Hard to Follow That One...

What's this? Another entry so soon? Sure, why not.  Thought I would answer some quick questions that I haven't addressed yet.

First of all, I have decided that my personal life is going to be private for a while.  I've made the mistake of throwing a bunch of stuff on social media and it just makes things harder.  Yes, I eventually will share, but for now, mum is the word.

Now, some of the questions.

When you meal prep (which I know takes hours), do you eat during that process?

Absolutely.  I "taste" everything.  I'm not going to lie, I cook pretty good, and when I start cooking, I can't help but eat.  The good thing is that it is mostly healthful, so no worries.

Do you have a regular gym schedule?

I do and don't.  I have a schedule, but I go to the gym when I can and when it's not full of people.  I like it when there are only a few people there, most of them know me by name, so It's a little more personal.  It's nice when I hear "Hey James!", "What's up Riggs?" or "Woohoo it's The Machine!"

Are you still training people?

Yes, but not a lot at the moment because my schedule isn't really allowing enough time for a lot of clients.  Look for a lot more #riggs shirts and posts very soon though.

When is your first video bog going to go live?

When it does. I really can't give you a time on that, as I'm still trying to figure out the flow of it.  I've got ideas, but I'm working on it.

Ok, so this was a quick entry, but I wanted to address those questions since I've gotten quite a few that are on those lines.  Keep your questions coming in!

Until next time dear readers...

A Long, Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far, Far...

So, it’s been a few days since my last post.  A lot has happened.  I’ve been busy, and I mean busy. Between work, kids, gym, personal training, and personal stuff, I’ve had about 10 minutes of “free” time (which is spent washing dishes).  I’ve gotten a whole lot of feedback on my last post.  The majority of it was positive, but some of the negative ones are sticking with me, which provided me with an epiphany.

In life (in general), the negative things tend to stick better in our memory.  This is because they hit on our emotions and insecurities more so than positive things.  It’s normal.   Think about your childhood, you will remember good things (I hope you do), and you will remember bad things (I know you will), and sometimes the scales are tipped a little unfairly.  Sometimes we get stuck on fixing the negative and ignore maintaining the positive.  It’s all about changing your mindset, and it’s not an easy task by any stretch.

Ok, so, just some little notes here...

As I’m sure you remember, I’ve been looking to get sponsored as an athletic performer, and I’ve had some interest, and some success.  Saying too much will obviously jinx it, so, that’s about as clear\vague as I’m going to get at this point.  I’m still getting closer to getting my personal trainer certification, and when I have some extra money laying around, I’ll pay for the certification exam and go from there.

Right now, I’m really busy, which is probably a good thing, but it does cut out time for some things, and I’m trying to juggle my schedule to make sure I can get to those things.  It’s a hectic time, but I must absolutely say that I am extremely grateful for everyone in my life, and to you reading this (yes, you!) I am very grateful for you too.

Now, my podcast is going well, listener base is starting to rise slowly, but it is rising, comments and questions are coming in, and I love it!  Good or bad, let me know what you think, ask me anything, ands I will answer, unless it’s of a personal matter.  Also, for you Apple listeners, it should show up in the apple podcast app shortly, I know that will make a few of you very happy, lol.

As always, I strongly encourage you to ask me questions, give me feedback or just say hi.  I usually respond relatively quickly, so fire away!

Until next time, dear readers...

Start off With Truth

Ok, so, honesty is very important to me, so I’m going to take a minute and be completely honest with you.

At the moment, I am looking for direction in my life.  Being honest, I’m not where I want to be, and I am looking for the first step to get to where I want and\or need to be.  Do I want to spend the rest of my life at my current job, and living in my current situation? No.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my job, I work with some great people, and I may not live in a palace, but I’m happy to have a place over my head.

The ways of the universe, under God’s command, have placed me where I am in this moment for a reason.  It’s not my job to try to find that reason, honestly, it’s my job to learn from my situation, what got me here, and try to better myself.  I’ve said it before, but the only person I’m in competition with is myself.  I just have to be better today than I was yesterday.  I feel like I’m doing that, to the best of my ability.   Everyday I learn something about myself or others that I can take to heart and work on\with.

Do I want to be single forever? No, I really don’t, no matter what type of front I put on.  Finding that someone to spend the rest of my time here on Earth with is not an easy task.  I have met some wonderful people that will always be my friend, no matter how anything else worked (or didn’t work) out.  I am grateful.  My heart is thankful for everything, good or bad, I am thankful.  It’s not like I’m trying to hide myself away or anything.  I am putting myself out there, I am trying, and maybe I should be, or maybe I shouldn’t be, I don’t really know.  I know that I want to take an active part in my life and not just watch everything pass me by.

I have many friends.  I’m not talking about Facebook friends, I mean people I’m friends with in real life, you know, that you can talk to, not just text to.  Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, has an opinion on what I should be doing, or trying to do.  That’s great, I appreciate input.  The thing is though, it is their opinion, like I said, so it is what they think from their point of view with the amount of knowledge they have about the situation(s).  I listen, I don’t just hear them.  Who knows, I might get that one bit of inspiration from a friend who is actually talking about something else.  I mean things work out in mysterious ways sometimes.

I’ve been continuing writing a chapter in my book that I know will never be read, its a chapter for me.  This chapter really captures a lot of my heart, and although I am releasing a lot of knowledge about myself in this book, what I am writing now is something I will share with no one.  Call it a more in depth journal entry, or what have you, but getting it out does help, ever so slightly.

On a final note, the podcast is taking off quite well.  I’ve gotten a lot of feedback, more good than bad, so that’s a sign, right?  Well, I’m going to let some (maybe) good news escape here - I was limiting my podcasts to 15 minutes for several reasons, but I’ve had an overwhelming response and many have asked if I can address x issue, but to do so would increase my weekly record time, so I’m removing that limit.  I’ll address everything sent to me up to the point I record.  Woohoo?

Until next time dear readers...